Recently Missing in America
Three HVAC units (from outside the Glenforest School in West Columbia, South Carolina, leaving the school's "canteen, foyer, bathrooms, weight room, and offices" without air conditioning)
The internal cash box from an ATM (from a bank in St. Louis, Missouri, after two people reportedly used a chain attached to an SUV to pull apart the ATM)
A ceremonial diploma and a bookbag (from a car outside a restaurant in Bowie, Maryland, while the owner was having lunch inside to celebrate his graduation from Bowie State University)
A safe containing approximately 150 watches, valued at $2.5 million (from a store called the Wrist Watcher in Tottenville, Staten Island,
Five miniature motorcycles with Shriner markings on them (from a gathering of the South Central Shrine Association in Shreveport, Louisiana)
Packaged roof shingles worth an estimated $4,000 (from a pallet in the driveway of a tornado-damaged house in Little Rock, Arkansas)
A Caterpillar 262D skid-steer loader (from a feedlot in Falun, Kansas, after someone used it to "smash through the fence")
Recently Found in America
A wolverine (in Yosemite National Park and Inyo National Forest, only the second wild wolverine seen in California since they were exterminated from the Sierra Nevada in 1922)
A 1928 Ford Model A (in Wilton, California, where it was apparently dumped after being stolen from a body shop in Orangevale)
Several severed deer legs (in yards in western St. Louis County, Missouri, presumed to have been left there by coyotes)
An abandoned sailboat called the Ocean Pearl (on the Five Mile River in Norwalk, Connecticut)
A copper box containing nine fire badges, four 1905 newspapers, and assorted other documents (in Marion, Indiana, inside the cornerstone of a fire station being demolished)
Two young opossums (in Homer, Alaska, where they are considered an invasive species, following the earlier capture of an adult female opossum there)
A truck loaded with 40 crates of church organ pipes (in Memphis, Tennessee, after being stolen from outside Calvary Episcopal Church, where a 1935 pipe organ had been disassembled and packed into 55 crates for shipping to a restorer)
WEATHER REVIEWS
Cambridge, Massachusetts, to New York City, June 4, 2023
★★ Trees tossed outside the hotel, in the bleak open space of Kendall Square, but the miserable rain had moved off or broken up at last. A little returning drizzle fell on the way out of brunch. By the time the car was loaded and running along the river, half sun shone through numbered red sails. The monotonous gray overhead had broken into clumps and clusters and trailing parts. A short burst of real rain fell on the Mass Pike, then a spell of drizzle, then more rain. All the way down Connecticut the wipers were never quite at the right setting. Chopped-up silver clouds filled the gap above the lush trees flanking the highway. The woods had given up their sacrifices to the road, in varying states of recognizability: fox-red shreds, a white stripe of skunk, grizzled raccoon, an entire broken deer. The wipers stayed off in New York, and real sun came in low on Broadway, for a moment, by the turn for the rental garage.
EASY LISTENING DEP’T.
SANDWICH RECIPES DEP’T.
WE PRESENT INSTRUCTIONS for the assembly of sandwiches from One Thousand Favorite Recipes, by Seattle, Washington’s Congregation Temple de Hirsch, Ladies' Auxiliary, compiled by Mrs. Sigismund Aronson and Mrs. William Gottstein, published in 1908, found in the public domain and available at archive.org for the delectation of all.
OYSTER SANDWICHES. One pint oysters; put juice into pan and add oysters chopped; then add half cup cream and yolks of two eggs, and enough bread crumbs and get it quite thick. Heat well and add salt, pepper and lemon juice to taste. Let cool and spread on buttered bread.
—MRS. SAM BROWN.
SARDELLEN BUTTER. Soak half pound sardellen, bone and mash them; add two tablespoons Neuchatel cheese, two tablespoons sweet butter, a little grated onion and a pinch of cayenne. Serve on toast.
SARDELLEN TOAST. Butter slices of toast and spread with sardellen butter. Place on top a few fresh shrimps, or a few raw oysters, with slices of hard boiled egg. —MRS. S. ARONSON.
If you decide to prepare and attempt to enjoy a sandwich inspired by this offering, kindly send a picture to us at indignity@indignity.net.
MARKETING DEP'T.
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